Thanksgiving

Today is my first Thanksgiving celebrating without the beautiful face of my youngest with me.  I keep wanting him to walk down the hall and say "good morning mom, happy thanksgiving, when are we eating?"  I want to see him sit on the floor and cuddle with our dog moto.  To walk up and down the hall leaving the light on, every time!  I want to hear him complain that I have the parade on the TV. 
Instead, I am searching, struggling, wishing, and doing my best to be thankful for what I have in my life and the memories that can not be stolen from me.
I want to set a place at the table for Tony, but I know it would be weird to look at the empty seat, but my heart will be seeing it anyway.
We will gather, eat, laugh, tell stories and feel uncomfortable.  But we will do this as a family and we will get through it. somehow, together.

This I am thankful for.